Boere Computer Dictionary from South Africa

Just got this in an email from my uncle and thought it was too good not not to post on here. Hope you all find it funny.

Boere Computer Dictionary from South Africa

Monitor:
Keeping an eye on the braai

Download:
Get the firewood off the bakkie

Hard drive:
Trip back home without any cold beer

Keyboard:
Where you hang the bakkie and bike keys

Window:
What you shut when it's cold

Screen:
What you shut in the mosquito season

Byte:
What mosquitoes do

Bit:
What mosquitoes did

Mega Byte:
What mosquitoes at the dam do

Chip:
A bar snack

Micro Chip:
What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips

Modem:
What you did to the lawns

Dot Matrix:
Oom Jan Matrix's wife

Laptop:
Where the cat sleeps

Software:
Plastic knives and forks you get at KFC

Hardware:
Real stainless steel knives and forks from Checkers

Mouse:
What eats the grain in the shed

Mouse Pad:
Where the mouse takes the grain it does not eat

Mainframe:
What holds the shed up

Web:
What spiders make

Web Site:
The shed (or under the veranda)

Cursor:
The old bloke what swears a lot

Search Engine:
What you do when the bakkie won't go

Yahoo:
What you say when the bakkie does go

Upgrade:
A steep hill

Server:
The person at the pub that brings out the lunch

Mail Server:
The bloke at the pub that brings out the lunch

User:
The neighbour that keeps borrowing things

Network:
When you have to repair your fishing net

Internet:
Complicated fish net repair method

Netscape:
When fish manoeuvres out of reach of net

Online:
When you get the laundry hung out

Off Line:
When the pegs don't hold the washing up



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